No, I don't have those mad skilz as a text hero. But I did find these cool texting acronyms for old folks, over at McSweeney's:
BIMD: Back in my day
ROFLACGU: Rolling on the floor laughing and can't get up
ML2N?: Matlock tonight?
OMGWTF: Oh my. Gee whiz. Tutti-frutti.
MBDC: My bad. Damn cataracts.
WIOLATS: Wore it out like a turn signal.
GTALNINFTCW: Gee, thanks a lot, now I'll never finish that crossword.
Not that I'm old or anything.
(YOU KIDS GET OUT OF MY YARD!!!!!)